Monday 5 January 2009
Depression by Deanna Addis
In an empty underground room, with only a small dim light coming from a far corner, lies a chair in the direct centre. A small man of middle age sits slouched with a bowed head and a fixed gaze. His breathing follows a perfect rhythm. His arms lie hopelessly on his lap with no hope or intention of moving again. His face has so long been serious, his eyes and every crease bare deep signs of pain and hopelessness.If there was a way out, would he choose it?Would he realise it?He cares not, his position stays a forever wounded statue.
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2 comments:
This is very impressive. 'd put the word 'underground after the noun 'room'. And I'd change 'direct' to 'dead'. I expect you don't want that over used word - if so then cut both, leave it as 'centre'. This is very well crafted work.
David
A wonderful description of depression. I love it and especially the last sentence, which was a spit'n'polish finish. Great work, well done.
Nathan.
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